Fore! Tiger!

Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, you really managed to get yourself into a pickle on this one. I mean your tee shot is off the tee and headed way left. You’re out of bounds on this one Eldrick. You fudged up. I know your sponsor is Nike and their slogan is “Just Do It” but for christ sake, they weren’t talking about your personal life situations. I should’ve known something was up ever since you’ve been on TV with those Gillette shaving commercials and looking all smooth and what not. I should’ve known you had some ladies on the side. Touche my friend, you played us all like a fiddle. I haven’t been this excited about a golf story since John Daly passed out at a Hooters Restaurant in North Carolina. http://www.theage.com.au/news/sport/golf/drunk-daly-taken-into-custody/2008/10/30/1224956185851.htmlWhat was Hooters thinking, giving him a sponsorship that included all you can eat and drink at any Hooters. Who wouldn’t drink them self into oblivion? I know I would.

Tiger you could’ve possibly avoided this situation in so many different ways, here is one story you could have told. You were going out to get milk for the babies. Hello you have a 2 year old and another young infant. I’m pretty sure milk is a big commodity at your estate. The public would have viewed you as a caring compassionate person who was just trying to provide what was needed for his family. That would’ve been the end of the story. I don’t know how much you pay your PR team to put all these lies together, but I would be making some budget cuts if I were you. They dropped the ball on this one Eldrick. I mean lets face it. Nobody gets in a car wreck as little as yours was and comes out with injuries that leave you lying in the street with that many cuts and bruises and going in and out of consciousness. Your air bags didn’t even deploy for Christ sake! I mean when you sell that car, I hope the next person who buys it asks for the car fax. The report will read something like this. Cadillac SUV with rear window smashed out by golf club. I mean I think that ups the resale value, if it was Tigers vehicle.

I understand your trying to protect your family and privacy, but you signed up for this along time ago. You’re the biggest and richest sports figure in the world. The public is going to follow you and want to know as much about you as possible. When baseball players get caught on the juice, most of them come out and talk about it. That is just the way it is. You are ruining your image by avoiding the situation all together. Be a man Tiger and own this. It is pretty obvious that you have had some affairs. There is too much incriminating evidence against you. They have saved texts, voicemails, and stories that prove these affairs, allegedly. I would like to give big ups to Jesper Parnevik, who is a golfer that introduced Tiger to his wife. She use to be a nanny for the Parnevik family.Take a look at what Parnevik said, “I really feel sorry for Elin, since me and my wife were at fault for hooking her up with him. We probably thought he was a better guy than he is. I would probably need to apologize to her and hope she uses a driver next time instead of the 3-iron." I mean that shit is hilarious. This is like a soap opera on NBC. Tiger, if I was your wife right now I would be filing those divorce papers ASAP. I know there is a prenuptial agreement, but still the woman is going to get paid. I wonder if she would get any of the green jackets in the divorce. Maybe a U.S. Open trophy, I don’t know.